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Memoirs of Smoke

I can’t write

right now
not about you at least
not ever maybe
about you
the least
safe to say never

it’s 3.41AM
and I need a new you

someone to write for
someone to right me
someone right
to write right
this night is not right
it’s fading already

I’m on a leash
and It’s raining outside
one of the many cliches
of this sleepless morning
the leash is blurred
leash being the memories

rain falls
falling leaves
leaves me mesmerized
small drops of rain
as well as the ripe mangoes
ganging up on the roof

maybe it’s closing up
the hole in which
I lost myself in
and crawled right back out
maybe I’m becoming whole again

the carved out heart
the renewed cigarette smoke
forgetful lies of lives
songs on repeat
blank spaces on the faded walls
abrupt silence follows

it’s 4.31AM
and I need a muse.

© 2016 Pamuditha Zen Anjana

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Times Change

Yet, I feel lost…

In a labyrinth with too many crossings
intertwining and running towards the same way
same way as if I’m missing that almighty spark
spark of sense, an ark of self-preservation

Thinking in circles again
as if I didn’t make me do that already
ready to catch myself as I fall again
as if I didn’t make me fall once already

So, I’m a lost soul…

Trading jokes for the love that I have
making my way through these senseless crowds
searching for my muse, my own guardian angel
you…

I was tired of trying, not tired of revolving around
not really resolving anything.. Nope! but still trying
breaking into thousand words, sometimes unheard
so it’s time to give up on giving up on you

‘Cause moving away…
is also a mean of getting closer…

© 2013 Pamuditha Zen Anjana